Skip to content

Chin-Wag: Alan Shearer & Cardiff City FC

June 14, 2011

There are two version of events, both detailed below.

1. What Cardiff City FC supporters HOPE the talks between Alan Shearer and those in power at the club are like in regards their managerial vacancy?

Anonymous Board Member: We wanted to talk to you, Alan about the managerial vacancy here.

Alan Shearer: (moving closer to the edge of his seat, chest puffed) Yes?

Anonymous Board Member: Who would you recommend for the job?

Alan Shearer:
..uh…well I…I thought you…

Anonymous Board Member: Who would you recommend for the job?

Alan Shearer: I…well…I suppose….Billy Davies?

Anonymous Board Member: Ok, good ,yes yes of course (summons aide, says quietly to aide: “take Kranky off the list”)

Alan Shearer: Pardon me?

Anonymous Board Member: Sorry, private moment. Anyone else who you’d think would fit the bill here?

Alan Shearer: Um..i’d say Alan Curbishley might…maybe..

Anonymous Board Member: Ok, yes, good good (summons aide,says quietly to aide “same applies with West Ham’s bitter pundit”) Anymore names?

Alan Shearer: Uh…well I don’t really..

Anonymous Board Member: Ok, not a problem, thank you very much for your time Mr.Shearer.

Alan Shearer: Well…you see…when you called me…I thought you wanted to talk to me about the manager’s job.

Anonymous Board Member: Well we have haven’t we?

Alan Shearer: Well no, I meant talk to me ABOUT the managers job.

Anonymous Board Member: Sorry Alan i’m not sure as to what you mean.

Alan Shearer: To me…Me… Me and the manager’s job.

Anonymous Board Member: Oh, Mr. Shearer… hahahaha (aide joins in laughter). Oh, you’re quite the comedian, Mr. Shearer. We’re not that desperate. Oh.. but thank you for making us laugh, it’s good that you continue your comedy routine away from the Match of The Day Sofa.

Alan Shearer: I beg your pardon.

Anonymous Board Member: Oh come on Alan, your analysis, the cliches…. surely it’s not serious?

2. What Cardiff City FC supporters FEAR the talks between Alan Shearer and those in power at the club are like in regards their managerial vacancy?

Anonymous Board Member: We wanted to talk to you Alan about the managerial vacancy here.

Alan Shearer: Yes.

Anonymous Board Member: We are aware of a growing trend with clubs that share similar ambitions to us at this level of the game right now. It seems that having someone who’s a deep connection to the English national team is en vogue for jobs in the Championship. Sven at Leicester, Schteve at Forest and we want to get in on it before everyone else gets in on it. We want to make three the magic number and want to know about your availabilityand your ideas for the club.

Alan Shearer: Well i must say first off, i’m surprised but hugely honoured.

Anonymous Board Member: We do have one more thing to mention before we go any further, before the press rumblings in regards our intentions. We want to have someone who has great meaning with the national team for all the right reasons, you know so we’re not seen as following Leicester and Forest’s lead on this we believe emerging trend. With this in mind, it’s only right to tell you that we did approach someone else.

Alan Shearer: Oh really?

Anonymous Board Member: Yes but his phone was constantly on divert and he didn’t respond to our texts.

Alan Shearer: Ok. May I ask who it was?

Anonymous Board Member: Michael Ricketts.

Alan Shearer: ………………..Oh then……………Fair enough.

Anonymous Board Member: Let’s be honest Alan, ignoring Ricketts and his credentials. We like you. We at Cardiff City Football Club like you a lot. Your job at Match Of The Day has been exemplary and after all,as long as you’ve played the game, your opinions are valid always and anyone who’s played the game can walk straight into management, right?

Alan Shearer: Exactly.

DISCLAIMER: please note the conversations noted above are entirely fictitious and are the creation of someone whose imagination has gone into overdrive and has gone perhaps a little too far with this idea. Any resemblance to any actual conversation is not intended and purely coincidental.

Advertisements
No comments yet

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: